siths silly story ideas
by sith2886
Summary: just some unbeta'd ideas I've been punching out. pm me if you want to use them,
1. frozen malestrom

AN: my idea for a naruto trained by the Lin Kuei (yes its a MK crossover) isn't really going anyhwere right now but maybe some day :shrugs:

oops for got the disclaimer, not mine, not making money don't sue.

"Heart rate is normal, seal matrix is holding at 90%" the young woman called as she examined the monitor infront of her she looked towards the back of the room, "he's maintaining control sensei."

The blue garbed man nodded and turned to the man next to him, "are you sure about this Jiraiya-sama. It is not too late to stop the ritual."

The old sage shook his head, "no let it continue, he'll need this, has there been any word on your apprentice?" it had been hard news to hear, that the girl he had helped train had fallen into madness. Memories of his former teammate and rival burned through his mind, 'so much potential, wasted.'

The man known only as subzero shook his head, "no, she is still alive, that much I know. Her intentions however are still in question, I may have to put her down again."

Jiraiya chuckled, "yes you other realm types seem to cheat death quite often. I remember Minato and my own encounters with you and scorpion" he shuddered, "at least Minato learned something of it and became a better man for It." the old sage reasoned. He looked back at the chunk of ice that dominated the rear of the room, his apprentice inside, cross-legged as if in meditation, "how is the containment seal on the shiki fuujin holding?"

The woman looked back, "holding steady Jiraiya-sama, it seems the demon is unaware of its jailors surroundings." She looked back at the readings, "he's ready for phase two, beginning condensing and dropping temperature to negative 30 degrees."

The two warriors watched as the block of ice seemed to crush into itself and the body inside shivered but remained in its position. Jiraiya smiled, "kids gotta be freezing in there." The other man nodded. "he'll survive though."

"And then he will begin the trials, just as his father did, just as you did as well."

The two men shared a look and Jiraiya smirked, "bet you a signed copy of my book he passes faster than any before him."

The cryomancer raised an eyebrow, "and if he doesn't?"

Jiraiya took one more look at the block of ice before it misted over hiding the sole occupant within, "then all of this was for nothing."

---fm---

It was cold, far colder than anything he had ever felt before. Spring had been cold, but at least then he had his jumpsuit and the cloak covering him plus the ability to make a fire. Here he had none of that, nor did he have the ability to call on his chakra for warmth.

'Use me'

Whatever ero-sennin and his cool looking friend had done to him before sticking him in this, this prison had cut off his chakra completely. Normally he could feel it, like a river flooding through his veins. Raw power used to create a hundred clones and beat the hell out of any opponent.

Now though…now,

'use my power, use it or you will die'

Now he was useless, no he was more than useless, he was dead. Chakra was the power of the living, the power of ninja. Without it he felt dead. He shivered; the cold was like being pricked with a thousand different needles all at once and all over his skin. It burned; stung like nothing he had ever felt.

'**I wonder if this is what Sasuke felt like.' **Naruto wonders as he sits in the ice. Thinking of Sasuke brings him back to the valley of the end, which in turn brings him to the betrayal. It's been months since he left Konoha, months that used in thinking. He knows that he can bring Sasuke back, that he can fulfill his promise to his crush. The question is does he want to?

Sasuke threw everything away for power; this isn't what makes naruto's fist clench or his jaw tighten. He would have done the same if it hadn't been for Iruka and the old man. it is the fact that Sasuke had no remorse, no second thoughts about leaving. He just did it.

This is what makes Naruto shake with rage, what makes him snarl and rage as he sits in the frosty clutches of his sensei's friend. Naruto knows remorse; he's buried friends and been to funerals. He's killed and witnessed death, feeling his soul slip away inch by inch each time he buried someone. Sasuke has lost family, there is no mistaking this but Naruto…

Naruto has lost everything.

Family, friends, these things were stolen from him long before Sasuke was in the academy. They were gone long before the boy had come home to see his family slain and his brother holding the blade. Sasuke has no right to do what he did, not when he is loved, respected and treasured as a person in Konoha.

Naruto frowns, why should he rescue Sasuke? It won't help him in anything. In fact it will do more harm than good. The boy will be a flight risk or worse he will be unstable. Naruto knows what an unstable person can do, he remembers Garra and remembers how he was like before kicking his ass.

Sasuke is worse.

The coldness eats at him, gnawing at his toes and fingers as he meditates, as he ponders over his friend. No, Sasuke isn't worth saving, not worth the time it would take to locate and drag back to Konoha. He'll be back for Naruto, his revenge demands it. He said as much in their fight. Naruto needs to be ready, needs to be prepared to fight his friend.

To kill his brother.

Naruto's breath is slowing, the oxygen thinning as if he was climbing a mountain. It's only now that he realizes he cannot move his arms or legs. Its only now, as his eyelids begin to droop and his breaths get shorter and shorter that agreeing to this was possibly a bad idea. As his eyelids close and his breathing stops he mentally curses his sensei, and falls unconscious.

---fm---

"heart rate is down, seal still maintaining. He's out Jiraiya-sama, subzero-sama."

The two nodded, "good, now it's all up to him. I hope your right about this Jiraiya." The man said eyeing his partner. The sannin kept quiet looking at the block of ice with a keen eye. 'come on kid, you can do it.'

---fm---

Naruto wasn't surprised to be in the sewer, nor was he surprised to feel the pull of the seal. What did surprise him was the temperature of his mind. Normally it was muggy and warm. The water was liquid and the air smelled of decay and sweat. Now though it was as frozen as a glacier, the walls, celing and floor all covered in ice.

Naruto walked forward slightly disoriented as he no longer recognized the tunnels. After a bit of searching he discovered the room holding the giant fox. But there was someone else in the room as well, some one Naruto had no desire to see this soon. "shin-shinigami-sama."

The apparition turned its masked face to the boy and cocked its head to the side, the fox roared behind it, "see, the boy still lives. The pact still holds!" it howled. The death god ignored the fox and made its way towards Naruto. The boy stepped backwards the mere presence of the god of the dead frightening Naruto more than anything before it.

It stopped before lifting its hand and pointing at Naruto. For a second nothing happened but soon a tearing sound was heard. Naruto looked down and saw that his body was tearing itself apart, he snarled. It wasn't going to end like this, not this soon. He stopped backing up and took a firm stance. The ice, as if reacting to his call lifted between the death god and Naruto, encompassing the boy in an icy shell. "not yet" the boy snarled, "I'm not yours yet, take the fox if you want, but you can't have me." The ice filled his lungs and covered his body.

His eyes, once blue as sapphires and filled with warmth became hard and cold, they bore into the mask of the death god, challenging him to try and take his soul. The god advanced only to be blocked by a spear of ice, it faltered backwards and cocked its head. It tried again this time the ice took a bigger shape, a dragon now stood between the god and the mortal.

The kyuubi was surprised, and a bit frightened. Where had the boy gained such power? And why was he unaware up it before? It watched as the death god threw back his head, seemingly laughing and spun around to the kyuubi. Its eyes now firmly fixed on the fox.

Grabbing hold of the bars it threw open the vage and caught the fox in a death grip. Silently it laughed as the two disappeared into oblivion leaving a startled Naruto and a slowly collapsing cavern. Thinking quickly Naruto began to force himself awake. The dragon faded back into the ice covered walls leaving Naruto to his own escape.

---fm---

"There, Jiraiya-sama his pulse is back. ETA on awakening two minutes and thirty seconds!" the woman cried.

Jiraiya sprang into action, beginning a series of hand seals; whatever was coming it was going to be huge. He only prayed that it wasn't the fox.

The ice began to crack and shatter. Chunks fell towards the floor below and shattered around the toad sage but he held firm. More and more pieces broke away and Jiraiya could see his apprentice's head sticking out from the ice. His once golden blond hair now a grayish yellow, his skin was pale and as the ice he opened his eyes Jiraiya felt fear for the first time since considering this plan.

Naruto's eyes were now chipped ice, the warmth and kindness seemingly gone in place of hard cruelty and a desire to inflict pain on others. The seal that contained the boy flickered for a moment, long enough for Jiraiya to bark orders to the now frightened priestess before it collapsed leaving the boy free to attack.

Instead he stood there, bits of ice and droplets of water dropping off his body. HIs head dropped and Jiraiya could hear the distinct chuckle. It was so different from the laugh he was used to, the one filled with mirth and joy. This was one on the brink of insanity, and Jiraiya fell into a stance prepared for anything that came with it.

The boy threw back his head and laughed, "It's gone, the fox is finally gone." He called, his voice echoing in the ritual chamber. He fell to his knees and began to cry, the tears turning to ice as they fell. Hesitantly the toad sage moved forward and placed his hand on naruto's shoulder. If he hadn't known what the ritual did he would have been surprised to discover the boy's body temperature as that of a cadaver. " how do you feel brat?"

The boy looked up at his sensei and the two icy orbs bore into brown, "cold, and…free."

Jiraiya nodded, "good follow me." He turned and walked away, his protégé running to catch up, "you passed the first trial of a selective group. I had to pull a lot of favors to get you into this, are you sure you want to continue?"

Naruto nodded his eyes glinting like ice in the sun, "yeah I want to continue, what's the next trial?"

The sannin smiled, "you'll see…"

---fm---

"There is something you need to understand brat." Jiraiya said after walking down a long corridor, "the lin kuei are not ninja, while the abilities and fighting style may be similar they are more warriors then anything else." He watched as his apprentice nodded but remained silent, a cold shiver ran up the old sages spine 'how much have you changed.' "you can still remain a ninja if you want but-"

"no offense ero-sennin, but was I ever a ninja to begin with?" the boy interrupted as he lifted his head to look at the man, "my fighting style was more back alley brawling then any actual taijutsu style, I relied on two jutsu and have no idea how to weave illusions. To be honest I was a warrior from the start."

Jiraiya nodded and stopped as Naruto stepped through the door way, Naruto turned and saw the old man smile, "good, you know what you are, now can you survive on that knowledge." The doors closed between them and Naruto narrowed his eyes. A crackling sound brought his attention back around as he watched torch after torch light the outside of the room in blue flame, what had he just walked into?

A creek was his only warning as a fist flew at him from the side, reacting quickly he grabbed the wrist of his attacker and steped back as his hand touched cold flame. His eyes widened as a mirror image of himself stepped out of the shadows with a grim smile and pale skin. Scowling he lunged at the clone and connected his fist with its face smiling in satisfaction as the clone shattered into pieces of ice and water. His victory was short lived however as another ice cold arm wrapped around his neck and began to add pressure. Two more ice clones came forward and aimed a fist at his stomach, Naruto acted as fast as he could.

Lifting his legs off the ground he kicked the two attacking copies in the face and landed his feet back on the ground and flipped the assailant over his shoulder while jabbing his hand into its throat. Shaking himself he looked back up and saw more and more clones appearing and charging him, 'time to test out this new power' Naruto thought. Concentrating hard he drew in the vapor in the air and in a sharp forward motion tilted his hands down to the ground. His attackers slid off balance and Naruto capitalized by slamming his foot into one and his fist another. But that had only stopped those two, he watched in horror as three more came at him and dodged his ice covered trap.

From behind him a chunk of ice came flying past and collided with the three, "a lin kuei is never alone, he has his clan at his back, and at his side." a muffled voice spoke from his side. Naruto looked up and saw a young warrior about his age, "never be afraid to call for assistance if you need it Naruto-san, and never hesitate to help another of the clan. Now shall we?"

The next few minutes were a testament to both his own and the strangers skill, the two watched each other's backs and helped each other without question. Naruto watched as the woman created senbon after senbon and threw them with pristine accuracy, he watched as chunks the size of himself were hurled as if they were wood. And the more he watched, the more he learned.

"hmm, that seems to be all of them, know this Naruto-san I don not like weaklings. We will meet someday and see who is the true successor to this clan. Do not disappoint me."


	2. shadows of the leaf

AN: i love naruto fanfic and i love the anime shadow skill, but i can't seem to merge them in the way i want. this was an attempt that i can't figure out if it failed or succeeded.

disclaimer: don't own, aren't making $$ so no taking me to court.

Sakura remembers…

She remembers the warrior, her friend. She remembers drinking debts and loud shouting. She remembers the destruction and chaos the woman left in her wake all in the name for her country. Above all else she remembers the girls fierce loyalty to her friends and brother. It why she stays back and lets Naruto fight, supporting him with long range attacks and explosive tags.

She remembers the hunter. Shy at first, but with a hidden strength only the warrior could bring out. She remembers the crush the girl had on her companion's brother, it's funny, seeing the same thing happen now. It's why she smiles when Anko take Hinata under her wing and turns her into a fierce warrior. History repeats itself after all.

She remembers the boy, Fierce and wild as his sister but not as flashy, not at first. She remembers his sigh when the tab comes and the look of disbelief as the warrior runs. She remembers the apologies and the dishes, how she loathes the dishes. It's why she agrees with Naruto when he screams and whines about the D-rank missions. A woman of her caliber should be out fighting not walking dogs or pulling weeds.

But above all else she remembers seals. Not the ones she uses now, they are dead, they have no spirit. She remembers her title, plasmaster and the role the name came with. It's why she writes her own seals, forcing a bit of herself into each one. So when Naruto runs head first into battle, Anko and Hinata right behind him she can call out and ask the seal its name and watch in satisfaction as it does more damage faster than those three could ever do.

Anko drinks…

She drinks to forget. Forget the war, her sensei and the little brother she left behind. She drinks to suppress the sorrow of not being there for him, not being able to help him grow strong and succeed in his dream. She drinks to suppress the urge to raise the third from the dead and beat him senseless for letting her brother rot away and become the thing he is now, a warrior relying on a crutch, after all a warrior who uses someone else's power is pathetic.

She drinks to repress the urge to go solo and kick her sensei's ass from here to kumo and back. She could do it to, seal or not. The forest was a fluke and she was sober, well sober enough to think it through. She could have crushed him with her feet and buried him in the ground. One good rapier would have done it.

She drinks out of habit. It's the one thing she remembers doing when she was free and having fun. She almost wishes the brat would come in to the bar and drag her out, the pink haired one apologizing as they went. She wants to see the looks on their faces, want to remember that she has friends who will watch her back and call her on being an idiot.

But really she drinks because she likes to. and it has worked for her, she was drunk when the Hyuuga heiress came to ask for help, she was drunk when the three brats requested her as there team leader for the assault on Ame, and she was drunk when she agreed. When the Uchiha's were dead she drank again and this time her friends joined her.


End file.
